Grateful for FOOD!

Behold off-season, holiday season, sweater season, snuggle up season, snow season, season of joy and taking the time to be grateful season!

Don't worry, I'm not going to list off all the things I'm grateful for, none of us have that kind of time!

What I am going to do, in honor of one of my favorite things to obsess about, FOOD, I'm going to share with you some of my go-to FOOD BLOGS.  

This is the perfect time of year to try out a new recipe or 100, and get a jump start on a sound nutrition plan for the coming race season.  Or whatever, to be honest, I don't EVER need a reason to explore food websites/blogs/recipes. 

Oh, also, I have no affiliation with any of the following, I just adore them and hope you do too!  A lot of them lean towards a Paleo diet.  I don't follow a "diet" of any kind, but I like that they use REAL FOOD, and fun alternatives to some of the not-so healthy foods a lot of Americans grew up with.

thespunkycoconut.com (just posted a great Thanksgiving menu)

lottieanddoof.com (can't wait to make their milk-liqueur)

buttermeupbrooklyn.com (delish maple snaps and espresso-kissed brown butter cookies & I made their Twisted Double Chocolate and Orange Swirl Bread for Christmas brunch last year - uh-MAZE-ing)

againstallgrain.com (also just posted on Thanksgiving favorites)

thepioneerwoman.com (butternut squash and kale quesadillas are one of my go-tos!)

pinchofyum.com (pomegranae, kale and wild rice salad with walnuts and feta...serves 4??  ha, oops!)

multiplydelicious.com (dark chocolate java cups...you are going to DIE)

withstyleandgraceblog.com (pumpkin spice chia smoothie...yummmm)

weelicious.com - just plain FUN

smittenkitchen.com

mybakingaddiction.com (fresh peach jalapeno margarita - YESSS!)

loveandoliveoil.com (goat cheese...wait for it.....sugar cookies!  You heard me. Don't knock it 'til you rock it!)

coconutandlime.com (raspberry thai basil jam & grilled beef salad tacos, I used carne asada and it was perfect)

chocolatecoveredkatie.com (where to start...peanut butter biscuits, avocado smoothie...)

chocolateandzucchini.com 

trimarni.blogspot.com - for ACTUAL nutrition advise for endurance athletes and good recipes too!

PLEASE share your favorites with me too!

Hope you enjoy and find some fun ideas to try this season!

XO

Sarah

I feel like an impostor.

As I've talked about, time and time again, I've spent a lot of time cultivating a healthier thought life for myself, which has rewarded me beyond my wildest dreams.  So much so, I was a little cocky and a little complacent, thinking that I had a good handle on it.  Not that I was going to quit the work, but that I could justify a break from the tools and routines I had in place to keep myself on track.
Ha, I'm sure you can all see clearly where this story is headed.... TRAIN WRECK!

Yup.
My training since Vegas has been going really well. I took a couple weeks to just do my own thing, put my feet up and jump in on some classes, group training, whatever.
After a few weeks, I more-or-less jumped back into training and a couple cyclocross races.
I'm extremely thrilled to be working with a new coach, Cliff English, so it's been a new routine and really fun for me.
BUT, something was missing. If you don't know me, I will tell you that I L.O.V.E. to train. Everything about it, every time I get to do it.  But I was feeling flat.  I would procrastinate my training sessions until the last possible second and I felt uninspired.  My motivation was trapped between really wanting to get going with this new program and feeling like I wanted to self-sabotage my workouts so that if I failed, it would be on my terms.  Because I know those self-sabotaging feelings well, I know how to push through them, but it's exhausting, I didn't understand where they were coming from.  After-all, I was coming off a great season and thrilled to be working with a new coach and filled with so much gratitude and optimism for the future.
A little over a week ago, I was listening to one of my fave podcasts (I listen to a LOT of podcasts) while running on one of my favorite local trails, on Impostor Syndrome. When I read the title, I wasn't even going to listen to it.  My thought was it didn't apply to me and would my time be better spent listening to something "inspiring."
My instincts told me to listen anyway.
As I listened, I kept thinking, gees, I can't imagine feeling like an impostor.  Feeling like I couldn't internalize my accomplishments and undeserving of my success.  Dismissing success as a fluke, luck, timing or deceiving others into thinking I was more intelligent or competent than I really am...
Yeah, it's a good thing I have this DOWN!
Ha!  It was a little over 20 minutes into the episode when it started to resonate with me, then about 5 minutes later, I was in tears....and tears...and more tears.
CRAP.  I too felt like a poser.
UGH, how did this happen?!
I'll tell you.  I worked so diligently on my thoughts on the front end of racing, leading up to and during a race, that I had neglected what I would tell myself afterwards. Afterwards I was a mess. I knew well enough to learn how to accept compliments and congratulations from people, but I was not internalizing that at all.  I felt like it wasn't real. It felt like a fluke. I felt that any minute the carpet was going to be ripped from under me and they would see I'm nothing special.  They would see I was just in the right place at the right time.  I felt that not only did I not truly deserve success, I didn't deserve the praise and attention.  It's even difficult to admit that because I don't want anyone to think I don't appreciate their love and support.  Truthfully, I can't even begin to put into words how grateful I am.
Now that I've made these realizations, it's time to take action by acknowledging and accepting that I am good enough, stop holding my breath and celebrate all wins-big and small.
And work on these things every day.

Here is a link to the podcast.
http://www.trishblackwell.com/29-overcoming-impostor-syndrome/

XO
Sarah

Painful awareness

Well, this is unexpected.  My next blog post was all planned out, to share with you the tools I used over the past year to get my Positive Mental Attitude in check.  

But, I feel compelled to share a few thoughts that have been on the front of my mind for the past week.  

As a triathlete/cyclist, I spend countless hours on the open road, daily risking my life to hazards beyond my control.  Some days I don't think twice about it, for whatever reason, my thoughts have been weighing heavy on me this week.  Then, with the news of Amy Dombroski yesterday, my thoughts seem even heavier.

There is no question that Amy lived an exemplary life, admirably and unapologetically pursuing her dreams and appreciating and loving every minute of it.

As quoted from a news article, "She didn't mess around with what people thought of her," Mara Abbott said. "She was passionate and she was happy and she was really able to live from a place that I think very few of us can."

Even if you didn't know Amy, I don't know how this wouldn't break your heart. It hurts.

Though it could be said, she was doing what she loved up until the very last second, I think this notion is overly romanticized in adventure/endurance sports. Do we let fear dictate what we choose to do, no, and for that I don't ever apologize.  That doesn't mean it's easy, and that doesn't mean we don't crave a full, rich, long and healthy life.  No one wants to go out early, no matter how big the bang is.  Our active/endurance sport/outdoor adventure community, though vast, is well connected and tragic events ripple quickly, serving as a reminder of how fortunate we are for making it through all those close calls and the fragility and scarcity of every moment.

Funny thing is, it seems the difference between us and everyone else isn't that we face these close calls, the difference is how painfully aware we are of them.  Our lifestyle does not allow us to forget not only how incredible this world is, as diverse geographically as there are ways to explore it, but also how incredible life is in the same way.

With a heavy heart, I rode yesterday.  I rode to remember and to also forget.  I was afraid and it was invigorating. I rode for joy. I rode for heartbreak. I rode for freedom.  I rode to appreciate the scarcity of every moment and how abundantly lived each one should be.  I rode to appreciate my body and what it has led me to accomplish. I rode for hours. I rode hard. It was brisk, my body was tired, my mind was exhausted and I was hungry.  But just as every time before, I didn't want it to end. I love to ride. Every.Time.

Please let this be a reminder to do what you love and love what you can do.  Spend your time with those you love.  Smile with all your heart.  Appreciate the moment. Don't worry about things that might happen, for that time may never come.

Train hard. Live well.

XO

Sarah

Mind Over Mountain

Some of you may have heard, nearly 3 weeks ago, I raced in Vegas (Henderson) at the Ironman 70.3 World Championships.  The race itself was great, but more remarkable than the way I raced physically was my mental and emotional preparation and race day execution.
As you may have guessed, yes, that is the segue into my non-traditional race report.
I'm assuming most of you really aren't terribly interested in a play-by-play of race day... my splits can be found at ironman.com.
Where was I...to set the stage for this story, lets rewind to 1 year ago at this race.
Basically I spent the few days before the race in 2012 incredibly anxious and uncertain of what I was doing there and how to quantify my expectations.  Not unlike big races I had done in the past, I was secretly hoping I could find a way to temper my expectations by sabotaging my efforts.  Usually that meant at some point, giving up on my efforts, accepting doubt as truth.  In fortuitous fashion a mechanical error (on my part) thwarted my best effort at a podium spot by setting both my bike and run splits 20 minutes off my goal (40 minutes total).  Post race, I spent the next month or so sulking around, and doing some, for lack of better description, honest soul searching.  I needed to figure out if I still had the passion to keep racing triathlon.  Beyond having that passion, did I possess the strength necessary to forge past the doubt and fear that had put the smack down on my progress and potential as a competitive triathlete.  After what felt like an eternity w/n my own head (about a week), there was.no question where my passion was and not only that, where my mind and heart needed to be in order to make my pursuit a reality.
Fast forward a few months and I had not only made a complete shift mentally, but I had also quit my "corporate job", started a new career centered more around fitness and triathlon and moved to a much more supportive community in Wenatchee.  If you have never done something like this, I highly recommend it.  It will push you in ways you didn't think were possible and you will learn more about your inner strength and perseverance than you ever realized was there.  Over the past 9 months, I have been through many ups and downs...so high I never thought I would come down and so low I was ready to throw in the towel...and every where between.  EVERY SINGLE DAY I recommitted to my goals and vision, which didn't make it easier as much as a reminder of where I started and how far I had indeed come.
This quote saw me through a lot:
"A ship is safe in the harbor, but that's not what ships are for".
My intent with this life is to do exactly that.  Live in every moment, pursuing what brings me joy and surrounding myself with people that make my heart smile.
For me, it has not always been easy to forge through fear and doubt in order to live true to my intent.  I have always been a master of training, physically pushing myself beyond what I thought was within my realm of capability.  But, I broke a LOT more than anyone realizes.

One of my great sources of inspiration has been from my fellow Wattie Ink teammates.  Stories of triumph, over fears, injuries, obstacles, etc.  These stories are awesome reminders of the fragility of life, vulnerability and validity that I am not alone on this journey.  Not only that, but my family, friends and Wenatchee community have been beyond supportive and up-lifting. My gratitude is beyond words!

Once racing started this season, it was clear to me how much impact these life changes had on my thought life.  Racing was no longer daunting, it was joyful.  Don't get me wrong, I've always loved racing, but it caused me copious amounts and anxiety, both leading up to and during an event.
It's no secret, that it has taken WORK to get to this point.  Daily reminders and mental skills exercises, cutting out what causes anxiety and spending my time solely with people and activities that would build me up.  I knew what I had to do, deep down I was a skeptical that I could change and that IF I did change, would it bring the results I hoped for.

Back to the present.  Though I had a few minor issues, my racing this season was an incredible success.  I trusted in my preparation and my ability to perform, and I used an ever so simple, yet effective mantra, "I believe I can".  EVERY time I started to doubt, have anxiety or feel my HR creep up a little too high, I repeated "I believe I can" over and over and over.  Without thinking about it, my HR would ease, shoulders relaxed and my head would pick up...yes, it REALLY does work!
Finally, here we are at IM 70.3 World Championships.  This was the true test of how far I had come.  I refused to let myself slip into my former mental state pre-race, by spending a little time relaxing and a lot of time hanging out with family and Watties to keep my mind occupied, as far away from over analyzing as possible.  Come race morning I had actually arrived relatively calm, despite the fact it was pouring down rain.  I did my due diligence, making sure everything was in place, nutrition dialed and bike was in working order.  There was one small hiccup in nutrition, but I just rolled with it, figuring panic would do me more harm than good.
Because racing with a clear and confident state of mind is so new to me, I had no idea what to expect, and could not wait to find out.  Seriously.
Once the gun went off, I found myself in a not-so-great position in the water, but I just found a rhythm and tried to stick with it, staying as relaxed as possible to conserve energy for the bulk of the race yet to come.  Maybe I conserved a bit too much.  Either way, I felt great coming out of the water and couldn't wait to attack the bike ride.  The pouring rain made for an interesting twist, but I'm from the PNW after-all, this was right in my wheel house!  As usual, the first 45 miles flew by, remaining right on my goal. Suddenly I had a thought that what-if I completely fall apart on the run and all this hard work would be for not..."I believe I can, I believe I can, I believe I can..." Whew, crisis averted.  KEEP PUSHING!
As I headed out on the run, I consciously took it SLOW.  Once I found my legs, I just tried to keep a rhythm.  All was looking up until excruciating pain started radiating from my left knee all the way up to my hip.  Oh man, just keep GOING!  The rest of the run went like this: BREATHE. RELAX. WATTIE - YAY! SMILE.  repeat.
I knew physically, and on paper, I was capable of a great result.  When I crossed the finish line, I had no idea where I stood and was not about to stand around waiting for results.  What I wanted was to be grateful for how far I had come and relax with my Mom for a minute.
About 30 minutes post-race, the results came to me and I was absolutely floored.  My first emotion was relief.  I had actually not let myself down, and had made my support team proud!  WHAT?!?!
Looking back, the experience is still very surreal.

I am grateful for pushing through the hard times and not giving up on myself not only in Vegas, but over the past year.  However, I have to give credit where it's due.  It would not have been possible without the following: my whole family (Mom, Jeff, Dad, Brother,  uncles Steve & Bill Smith, Grandma & Mike Pettus, and my grandma Barkley who used to chase down JackRabbits in the fields of Kansas), Wattie Ink, Power Bar, K-Swiss, BlueSeventy, FuelBelt, ISM, Specialized, Arlberg Sports, SET Coaching (Jason Jablonski), Gold's Gym of Wenatchee Valley, Polar, Adventure Wenatchee, Gale Fruit Company, my loving and uber supportive friends, the inspiring athletes I coach, and my incredibly encouraging and supportive Wenatchee community.
THANK YOU WITH ALL MY HEART!

"Vulnerability is our most accurate measure of courage" Brene Brown

Having spent hours upon hours this past weekend with my own thoughts, Brene Brown's words were stuck on a loop that I couldn't shake.
"Vulnerability is our most accurate measure of courage."
And, that of the original definition of courage, which is "to tell the story of who you are with your whole heart".
Got it.
Everything about triathlon makes me come alive and my heart sing.  Pushing my body to places I never imagined possible is a very vulnerable place to go, but it's where I thrive, and it is the story my heart has to tell.  In order to live the life of my dreams, it's required to let go of parameters, judgment and doubt. Not only that, but it's also required to adopt the belief that I'm worth the life I crave.
Easy, I got this.
Willingly or not, vulnerability sometimes sucks.  Leaving ourselves open, virtually unprotected leaves the door wide open for a LOT of REALLY GOOD things, but we can't selectively let only the good in. Life is meant to be lived in full abundance, not only abundantly good.  So, along with the good, comes some bad, hurt and struggle.
My point is not to bring to light that life isn't all wine and roses, but to remind you (and myself), that it's not supposed to be easy, you are always stronger than you think, and to have belief that it will be worth it.  Courage is not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it.

When life hands you peaches...

First of all, if life hands you peaches, you already know you're one up on the lemons.  Which brings me to the second thing you should be grateful for, Peach jalapeño margaritas!  Seriously.  You can thank me later.  If life hasn't dropped a box of peaches on your door step, find some.

Why peaches, you ask? Well, here's the thing.  Sometimes it can feel like you were given a big box of lemons, which can be a little overwhelming.  What can I possibly do with all this sourness?  Do I have enough sugar?  But, have you ever thought that maybe, just MAYBE, it wasn't lemons to start with? Chances are that you might have been given something more like peaches.  Sometimes even ripe peaches need a little time off the tree until they're perfectly edible.  And the possibilities from there are virtually endless.
Sometimes I find my self reacting before I know what's really in the package.  Instead of being reactionary and trying to fix the problem right away, it just so happens, that sometimes the best thing to do is take your time to figure it out.  Take a step back so you can see more clearly, take a deep breath and trust that you will know exactly what to do and have all the tools to handle whatever it is. Another good thing about peaches is that they freeze well too.  So, you can cut them up into smaller pieces, put them in the freezer and deal with them a little at a time.  You see, it's also important to realize that you don't have to figure it all out at once or come up with the perfect divine solution right away.  Start with trusting yourself, your instincts and your intention and move forward.  Yes, you do have to move, that part is up to you...but the margaritas can be helpful if you're stuck.

When life hands you lemons, you have the ability to turn them into peaches.  Just make sure to keep some tequila, lime and jalapeños around for the occasion, and please invite me over!

PS.  Washington peaches are now in harvest, how convenient!

What IS

I've actually been sitting here working on my long-over-due race report from Pacific Crest. Though there were quite a few highlights from not just the race, but my travels to Bend, it's not what I feel compelled to talk about.
Yesterday, I signed up for a SUP Yoga class, and though I was very excited when I signed up, I realized once the day arrived that I wouldn't be able to squeeze in my bike/run training before...which is what I usually prefer.  I mean, what better way to end a hard day of training than a good yoga session to get things loosened up, add a little muscular endurance and nothing can beat my favorite pose, Shavasana.
As it were, I just couldn't make it work...so I'd start my day with Yoga and end with my bike/run, which would also fall smack dab in middle of the days heat.  Deep breath.
I knew there had to be a reason for all this and I needed to just let go of my perception of the "best way" to get things done and not just try a different way, but believe that it could potentially be better. Breath.
Let me just say, SUP Yoga surpassed my expectations!  Thank you Bridget Shae and Ila Yoga!
It was definitely a challenge, but you really can't beat the serenity of practicing on water.  Magical. Seriously.
Though I was still a little unsure of how the rest of my day would unfold, I revisited my intention for the day, and carried the belief with me that there is a chance this would be better than I imagined.  It was.  At first I felt a little sluggish during my warm-up, but I really tried to just stay in the moment  and accepting of what IS instead of over thinking.  Starting the day with this mindset from yoga, ingrained it into my thick skull and translated seamlessly to training.

This view didn't hurt either.

My expectations so easily put parameters on everything, which in turn, limits the outcome.  
I am tired of living a limited life, aren't you?
Today, I give myself permission to let go of my expectations, to live beyond my parameters and accept that what IS, is so much more than I planned.

Onward.  XO

Sarah

PS.  I'd like to start every day this way, if anyone is interested in teaching a 4am yoga class, I'm in!